Deadlines

I'm back again with another post! So soon right? Taking Friday today as a small opportunity to take a breather from a very hectic week back at school.

Yesterday especially... was an extremely exhausting day for me. I had an assignment due which I started some time ago but can't seem to be at peace with it. There were constant changes to what I wrote, my references weren't as good (because I'm kinda bad at referencing) and etc. Well, you get the whole picture.

So, with some advise from my course-mate, I managed to get back on track and was more decisive on what I was going to do for assignment (even though I still don't like what I wrote... I felt that it wasn't enough in content though the word count was great). 

My assignment was due yesterday, Thursday, and I burnt the midnight oil past Wednesday night until the wee hours of Thursday morning, making sure that I did things correctly. I was being extremely paranoid at that point to the point that I couldn't even fall asleep though things were done and completed. I guess that the stress crept up on me. 

I only fell asleep when I start to see the light of day outside my window. I slept for about only 3 hours and I had a full day of lectures and tutorials and night time Bible study. Wow! Thinking back to it, I totally wondered how I even survived through the day! I bet that my aunts or my parents will chide me for not having proper sleep and all if they should read about this.

They have been getting on about having proper and regular sleep because bad sleeping patterns wears out a person health-wise. I've to clear that I'm trying to sleep early these days, latest by 11 pm. But, this was a special case as I couldn't sleep because of my assignment deadline and all. Also, I compensated my sleep deprivation by sleeping in until 9.30 am this morning!

I have more deadlines to follow in the coming week and a test tomorrow. Ha! I'm so not ready for it. Anyway, I believe that God is good and I can lean on Him when times get tough.

I came across this a few days ago and I found it pretty true. When you're press for time, your creative juices tend to flow more abundantly. Well, in my case that is. Though I would totally advice you and also make a mental note to myself, to never put things off to the last minute. It wasn't a last minute preparation for me but many of the changes to my assignment was definitely last minute. 

To another hectic week coming ahead,

Hannah

Mid-Semester Break OVER and GONE

Well well well... what's up people? I haven't got the time really nowadays to drop by for a post because guess what? My mid-semester break is officially over and I'm back in uni for classes, tutorials and lectures now.

I'm back here for a short post because I'm currently suffering from a writer's block from writing an essay for my English Language & Linguistics class (yeah... so everybody knows that I'm taking this module... for now). How I wish there's like some magic pen or maybe with a clap, my essay would magically be written, ready to be submitted already. But then, who am I fooling right?! All university students go through this phase I suppose.

I love attending my lectures and classes (really!!! well, maybe not all of them but most! :D) but when there's like so many assignments dumped on you, or in my case, when I get many assignments and project,  I get kind of demotivated to even do them. Like, I lost all my willpower or something. I get really cranky and easily irritated when I'm doing my assignments. (So, don't come near me when I'm doing my work or I'll bite! Just Kidding~~)

And with my writer's block, I decided to come in for a little while and post something on the blog. Hoping that I'd maybe get some inspiration somewhere, somehow to continue my essay.

This reminds me of a picture, titled "Don't Give Up!".

I know I'm not digging for diamonds but you get the meaning of what I'm trying to relay here. I'm trying to give myself a pep talk here like "Giving up is for losers!!" or "Don't be a chicken!".

So yeah, that's what I'm currently experiencing, right here, right now. I guess it's hard for now but I believe that hard work pays off. That's how the saying goes right?

Other than that, I finished most of my assignments except for a couple of my essays and a small part of a video project that I'm working on with a group of friends. My Korean video is done and submitted!! Hopefully, it fulfills my teacher's requirements and get a good grade for it. I find the Korean video that 3 of my friends and I made very funny!! Okay, maybe VERY FUNNY TO US only... but I can never watch on because it's SO EMBARRASSING! *fingers crossed that my Korean teacher won't show it to the rest of the class*

Oh and before I end for this post, I came over a pretty cute cartoon. It's "OCTOBEAR" now! Hahaha!! Get it?! Get it?! "OCTOBEAR" = "OCTOBER"??!! Oh okay.. not funny.

Lame, I know... Well, I've got to get going now. Have a great week ahead errrrbody!!

Gonna go finish up my essay now, toodles!

Hannah

p.s. Was supposed to publish this post at around 11pm but then there was an electricity outage in the house. Took up about 40 minutes to fix it. So here it is! :)

Growing up with Tom and Jerry

Just wanting to share something to break the long silence here on the blog. (I've been very, very, very busy ><)

I saw something that intrigued me while surfing 9GAG just now. 

I find the above statements absolutely so true. 

"Childhood is time when you like Jerry and admire his smartness. Maturity is time when you understand, that Jerry is a complete asshole and you feel sorry for Tom."

I've spent a fair share of my childhood watching cartoons on TV and one of the cartoons that I used to like watching was 'Tom and Jerry' alongside with Dexter's Laboratory, Powerpuff Girls, Johnny Bravo, Cow and Chicken, Totally Spies, Kim Possible and many, many more. I can't believe how much TV I watched. 

I was no couch potato when I was younger. I spent a lot of time playing outdoors in the neighbourhood with the neighbourhood children. I remembered how my grandma who used to watch us (her grandchildren) during the day would bar us from going outdoors to play and we would sneak out anyway and get into trouble when we came back home. Oh, how I miss the good fun in the old days...

Sorry for side-tracking and back to the topic. I used to enjoy Jerry's wits and enjoyed Jerry always outsmarting Tom. I used to hate Tom as a kid, like why did Tom always bully Jerry and make trouble for Jerry. Obviously, I loved it when Jerry won over Tom and think that Tom deserves what he got.

But as I grew older and re-watch those exact same cartoons that I've seen as a child, I find Jerry a nuisance and I would empathise with Tom. Watching Tom and Jerry with an older mindset makes me realised that it was Jerry who caused and find himself all the troubles and lands himself in all the mess that he created. In the end, I grew to dislike Jerry.  I find him rather annoying. HAHA!!

Growing up really does changes people huh?

Here's to growing up,

Hannah

Just an update on Hannah's life

I've been pretty busy these days. Mostly busy with the piano. Yes, piano! 

Actually, I haven't been going for my piano lessons since last October, which makes it about 9 months since I've been playing the piano on a regular basis. Sorry Teacher Fel! I promised her that I'll be back for lessons soon after my A Level but I've been dragging on and on - because of me travelling often, being away from Brunei and being occupied with other commitments.

I'm a little rusty with the piano even though I've been playing it at times (rarely!). I've been asked to write out music scores for a couple of songs for Sunday School and I'm trying my best to do it. It's a challenge for me because I'm not a musically inclined person (I have to practice a lot compared to those natural talents who pick music up easily) but it's been nice, spending lots of hours with my piano. I do enjoy my moments spent with it :)

Also, I'm trying to blog more often. Compared to last year, in the course of 6 months (I started back in June 2012), I've blogged about double or even triple the amount of posts than I do this 6 months (2013). Yeah, I know. I'm not the most consistent person out there but at least there's some progress going on or as some would say, it's better than nothing.

I didn't know that my dad reads my blog - but I did talk to my dad about my blog at times (the very few times, countable on one hand). My dad says that I don't blog about anything much that's going on around me and my life, but instead blog about the more general things and other people or other events and so on.

I admit that I'm not very comfortable with sharing about my very personal life (only general stuff) or personal pictures or whatsoever personal here on my blog just yet, since it's open for public to see. I did those though for my previous blogs. Haha!!

I think as I grow older, I tend to keep more and more things to myself. Even my Facebook account! I was really active with Facebook a few years ago but as I age, I don't even update my Facebook anymore. I only use Facebook to stalk catch up with other people's life events. 

I think that maybe I should start slowly. There are family members of mine who are living far away from where I am who are reading my blog as well and I'm sure there's a certain few (won't name you out :P) who are always curious about me. So maybe, just maybe, I may start revealing my more personal bits and pieces. But it's just that nothing much or interesting is going on in my life right now.

Other than that, I hope that my days ahead for this week would be better. Fell into a big slump for the past weekend because I wasn't in my best condition and was feeling rather awful and lethargic - I was really easily irritated and annoyed and got all moody and upset about many useless things. I didn't want to talk to anybody because I just wanted to be left alone. I think I scared quite a few people because I'm usually portrayed as a friendly and amicable person (I think :P).

I feel sorry for the few people that I wasn't very friendly and nice to. I want to apologise sincerely right here (that is if you're reading this. Haha!). I wasn't really myself for the past weekend because I was just so sore and tired, just feeling really stressed about the past hectic week that had taken a toll on myself. Sorry!!

I'm going to be facing another busy week next week. Kind of looking forward to it but at the same time, not so ready to face it. Can't make up my mind about how I feel - mixed feelings.

Just trying to keep myself afloat now. I can do this.

Sorry that it's such a lengthy and wordy post.

Hannah

p.s. I just checked and this blog of mine is officially 1 year old!! Yay me!! :D Reality strikes since 12th June 2012 - 1 year and counting.

Up, Up, Up

I've been very busy for the past month of May. Hectic and stressful but I'm thankful that by God's grace, I'm able to overcome whatever challenges that came my way even though I almost just broke down all the way a few times. Tears, fear, anger, desperation - a roller coaster month for me! I was so caught up in my world that I haven't have got the time to use the computer except for a few short times here and there.

I actually finished the work that held me by the neck by the end of May. I had a lot more freedom this June, or more so, the past 5 days :) I couldn't be more happier and I've been meeting up with friends who came back home for Summer from university and college overseas and most of all, DOING A WHOLE LOT OF READING! (I'll get back to my books in the next post soon to come, so stay tune)

Well, in the midst of all the crazy busy-ness, I actually went online that one day - 21st May. You know, just to check up on my emails that was piling up and to escape my responsibilities for just a little while. While I was scrolling down my Facebook feed, I came across an article that came with a video which showed a story of Zach Sobiech.

The article was about an 18-years-old boy who just died and the video that was about 22 minutes long is about his life after he found out that he was dying from osteosarcoma. 

I've included the video that I watched here for easier viewing.

I watched the entire video, pausing a few times halfway through because it was really hard to watch it through knowing that this kid just died a day ago (or less than a day ago since my time zone and his time zone were vastly different). 

While watching it, I was thinking of how pain and sufferings that he has endured for the past few years, the sorrows and grieve his family and friends were feeling. This feeling caught me personally since I've been through this a couple of times and the last was just a year ago. 

I'm just amazed at how optimistic Zach is through this entire ordeal. He even had a girlfriend who was his pillar of strength and support for the past 11 months before he died. Videos like this always make me think about me, my life. Like, what in the world am I doing with myself while somebody somewhere is struggling and trying so hard just to survive?!

I love one of his quote that has been haunting me in the back of my head:

"You don't have to find out you're dying to start living"

I've read comments saying that this is such an inspiration and all. Yes, I do agree. I've watched a fair share of such videos and every videos like these always open up another small part of me, changing my perspectives about myself, my life and the world, little by little. It's not a 180 degree of change but enough to improve myself slowly.

Also, another thing that caught my attention was that instead of writing farewell letters to family and friends, Zach wrote a song so that everyone can have a little part of him. It's called "Clouds" and I love the song! I've been playing it again and again and again. Singing it here and there many times, over and over again.

The above is the video of his song "Clouds". I find the lyrics really touching and meaningful, inspired by his girlfriend if I'm not wrong. It's just beautiful. 

Just sharing a bit of my thoughts about Zach, who's a fighter. I've never met him but it seems like I know him already. Even though it's been a few weeks since he passed away, I still pray and hope that his family will stay strong and take comfort in the fact that Zach is no more suffering and in pain. God loves His children. :)

Up, up, up,

Hannah

Mother's Day 2013

It has come to this time of the year again. MOTHER'S DAY!! Even though everyday should be a day where you honour your parents but today is more special especially to all the mothers. I want to wish all the mums all around the world and especially my mummy a very Blessed Mother's Day!!

I'm so thankful that I have a mum (and dad too! But today, I'm dedicating this to mummy) who works so hard to provide for the family so that all of us in the family can lead a comfortable and a fortunate life. [My family has a dual parent income and I hail from a middle-class family for those of you who are curious. It's just enough for us to lead a nice and comfy life.]

Thank you mummy for all the sacrifices that you've made so that we can have the best. Thank you for being there, being our chauffeur driving us around when we need it and for buying us yummy snacks and foods which dad sometimes disapprove of :P Thank you for providing me with such a blessed lifestyle. Just thank you for everything.

I know that I may not be the best daughter ever, nor the most obedient and submissive kid, but I just want to thank you for being so patient with me and tolerating me and all my nonsense and my silly, idiotic antics. :)

Hehe... I know I'm not a person who regularly profess my feelings but today I just want to say that - Thank you so much mummy and I love you! <3

Not only to my own mum but to all the women - the many aunties in my life whom have been like a mother-like figure to me. Even though some of you are not mothers but to me, you're just like my mama. :)

Just to name a few whom I'm very grateful to like:- 

• My 2 grandmas and my god-grandma, 
• my mum's 2 sisters - Auntie Pheng and Auntie Shim, 
• my dad's 7 sisters - Da Gu, Er Gu, Fun Gugu, Phyllis Gugu, Ha Gugu, Fei Gugu and Ling Gugu especially to Fei Gugu and Fun Gugu for taking such good care of me when I had my long vacation back in KK and also to Phyllis Gugu for taking care of me when my parents are not around and all,
• and also to Auntie Rosemary, Auntie Rachel, Auntie Jeanne, Auntie A.Wah and many, many more!!

All of you have been such an encouragement and an inspiration to me. I just can't fully proclaim how grateful and thankful I have to have my mum and all these aunties all around to look after me. You guys are the bomb!! :D

Enjoy this wonderful day and enjoy your glorious moments fit for a queen :)

Many love and hugs to all of you,

Hannah

Hello May ; Just a little update

So, I've reiterated that I haven't been the most regular person ever to update her blog but it's okay. I blog lazily leisurely as I wouldn't want to pressure myself to produce blog entries, one after another, which then would put me off blogging and it's not like anybody would want to read my posts anyway.

Truthfully, I've never publicised my blog anywhere other than on Twitter, where I'd do a few tweets regarding my postings once in a while. So, if anybody else who's here on my blog reading this right now, not coming here through my Twitter, then you've stumbled into my world. Hello there and welcome :)

I created this blog mainly to keep my writing juice flowing since I haven't been doing a lot of writing since I graduated high school and I wouldn't like my English to deteriorate further than it already has. Pardon my lousy English - I'm not like those good bloggers out there who uses flowery words to enhance the quality of their posts whom I envy (also because I don't know that many of them flowery words to use appropriately :P)

Well, it's May already. Can you believe it?! Because I, for one, didn't exactly realised that we've hit May until I saw the date on my phone when I woke up yesterday morning. What happened to the past 4 months? It flew by so fast that I could hardly savour it.

Nothing really interesting has been going in my life right now. It's the same old peaceful  days passing by, unlike the colourful lifestyle that many of my friends are having being overseas - some studying, some travelling. I would love to be travelling right now. Anybody out there who wants to sponsor my air fares + travelling allowance?

I'm neither an avid risk taker nor an enthusiastic adventure seeker, which explains my  rather mundane lifestyle. Hopefully, life will take a better turn in the later part of the year for me. Right now, I'm fine being where I am. The coming days in May would be pretty busy for me due to certain circumstances. I'm not looking that forward to it but it'll do. I'm so thankful for all the good days I'm having now.

Life is good for now,

Hannah

Grow in experience, find happiness in the ordinary.

I was watching a Singaporean Film - Timeless Love (Chinese title: 那个夏天) the other day, that I came across this quote that I find rather meaningful. Oh, the movie is quite nice. Many of my favourite cast were in it. Go watch it if you can. :)

The original quote in Chinese from the movie itself:

人生要经历风雨，才能窥见彩虹的美丽；要经历过挫折，才会认识自身的不足；要经历过失去，才会懂得珍惜现在所拥有的；要经历过痛苦，才会明白幸福多么不容易。

在经历中成长，在平凡中寻找快乐。

For those who doesn't read Chinese, below is a rough translation of the text above that I tried my best to make out of:

In life, one must experience the storms of life to catch a glimpse of the beauty of the rainbow; one must experience setbacks in order to recognise their own shortcomings; one must experience loss then only will they know how to cherish what they currently have; one must experience pain to know that happiness is not easy.

Grow in experience, find happiness in the ordinary. 

Don't you find the quote speaking about some of the rules in life? All the ups and downs, the good and the bad, the beautiful and the ugly. 

In life, we have taken many things for granted. Only when we lose sight of something, then only will we start to panic and grieve. Then it'll be a little to late to get back that moment in time. Slow down, take some time to appreciate the little things around us. :)

Slow down and live life,

Hannah

The Better Person

Today, I broke down and cried. I cried in disappointment, in anguish... 

There's so much emotions stored up in me, that I couldn't take it anymore, that I just sat down and cried. I tried to recollect myself but I just couldn't. The many feelings that has been kept inside of me, the feelings that no one else besides me that knows and understands... the bottled up feelings just came pouring out through the streaming tears, flowing down from my eyes, staining the bed-sheet and the clothes that I was wearing.

I just cried and cried and cried. While crying, I was praying. I was asking God to calm down my heart. I prayed for peace and for comfort... but the tears just continued rolling down my face. Like God was just asking me to just cry it all out instead of keeping all the negativity that I gradually stored inside of me.

It was the first time in a long time that I've cried so hard that my shoulders just shook uncontrollably. I cry because I'm hurt. I cry because I'm tired. I cry because I'm angry with myself. I've put up a strong front for a long time that I've exhausted myself and had to cry to relief myself.

I've always been trying to be the better person among the people around me so that I can see them be happy. I'm the kind of person that becomes happy when I see others being happy, most of the time though, not always as I'm only human.

This is me.

The person who tries to give the best to the people around her. 

The person who gives in to others so that they could be happier. 

The person who does the unwanted job that nobody wants to do just so that everyone is happy in the end.

The person who gets into unfavourable circumstances so that the people around her can stay in their own familiarities, their own comfort zone.

Despite being the better person (not all the time because I'm imperfect), have I lose out? I find that I've thrown myself into a deep hole unknowingly, unable to get myself out at times. There were many times that I really did not want to be the better person, like the time where I was being volunteered by others to do the things they didn't want to do so that they can stay in their own skin.

I wondered if the people around me have ever spared a feeling for me or ever tried to understand me. Have they tried to understand where I'm coming from? Have my being a better person gave others an upper hand, taking advantage me? Have my giving in become a norm that they can do whatever they want?

There's many questions that I asked myself, like why am I always the disadvantaged one? Why am I always stuck in these kind of mess? Why is things so unfair? Why don't I get treated better when I've treated everyone as nice as I could?

Sometimes, being the better person sucks. I'm not asking for any acknowledgments but it would be nice to be treated a little better. It's like me being the better person has become a natural to them, sometimes even being taken for granted.

I tell myself at times, why do I even bother? Does anybody sees the good works that I do? 

I was doing my quiet time a little later after my breakdown just now. Right then, this verse came across. It's not the first time such a thing has happened before. It's like the words that God has wanted to tell me or something. 

Colossians 3:17 (New International Version)

And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.

I don't do good things or be the better person just because I want others to see all the works or the sacrifices that I've done. It all comes back to the starting point. Seeing others happy makes me happy as well. Though not all the time, I would try to tell myself that it's all worth it.

To all the people who have been the better person just so that I could have better opportunities, I'm very thankful to you. Even though I could have forgotten to thank you, I would like to say a BIG Thank You to all of those who've been so considerate and nice to me. To me, your selfless sacrifices and love has been so amazing that I'm constantly inspired to be the better person. 

After much crying and praying and the Bible verse that I came across during my devotion, I felt a sense of calmness and peace over me. Because to me, God was the BIGGEST and the BEST person of all time, sending His Son to die for us on the cruel cross so that we may have salvation. 

Always and after remembering how Christ has sacrificed Himself for us, it makes me want to be the better person. It's not always easy, but I'm sure with God's strength, I can do all things.

Love and Grace,

Hannah

^ The truth. True feelings from the bottom of my heart.

Learning how to drive

I haven't been updating this blog as often as I ought to. Just a short update here, to let everyone know that I'm still alive over here :P

Hmm.. what have I been doing these days?

I've been taking my driving lessons for some time now (I have yet to fulfill the 15 hours minimum of driving practice). I'm hoping to get my driver's license soon but I'm not  very confident that I'll pass in one go. I have tiny fears while driving on the road. It's not all that easy and fun as many thought it would be.. well, for me that is. It'll definitely ease my parents' burdens if I could drive.

Well, here in Brunei, all driving learners must drive and learn with a MANUAL car. Manual car scares me! An automatic car has only two pedals -the brakes and the accelerator. Meanwhile, in a manual car, there's an extra pedal - the clutch, other than than the 2 mentioned before.

I hate stick driving! For some of you that don't know, stick driving means driving a manual car. It's like you have to change the gear stick all the time and while you change, you got to press on the clutch. Also, if you don't have good handling on the clutch.. oh boy, you're gonna have a hard time driving a manual car because your car will stall like crazy!!

I stalled far too many times during my first lesson. It was my first time ever behind the wheels (yes, I'm a law abiding citizen, not secretly driving out and about without a license) and driving a manual is quite a handful or in this case, feetful? :P

Your hands and feet must coordinate together. Some people will tell me that it's easy just because playing the piano, which I do, also requires hand and foot coordination. It's very different and much more difficult from playing the piano. While driving on the road, looking out for cars, you also have to move your hands, one changing the gears and another one on the steering wheel.

When on the slopes, you've got to listen to the correct engine sound to change pedals so that your car wouldn't fall backwards. While parking, you've got to learn how to estimate the space correctly . On the roundabouts, make sure you don't stall, drive and signal correctly when changing lanes. All these... I haven't yet a perfect grasp but I'm still practicing and I'm sure one day I'll be as good as all the other experienced drivers out there.

When driving, you not only have to consider your own safety but also the safety of your passengers and other road users as well. There are many road bullies on the road and I've met quite a few of them while practicing driving on the main roads other than practicing in the driving circuit at the Land Transport Department. They just cut your lane without signalling in a really fast speed and all... and that sometimes make my driving instructor go mad as well. :( 

While on this topic, I'll apologise to the other road users that I've met while practicing driving. Sorry for being so slow, sorry for lacking in better driving skills and confidence, sorry for being a possible road hazard. Thank you to all the nice drivers for understanding a learning driver - for making way and slowing down or even flashing your headlights, giving us good opportunities to proceed especially at the U-turns whenever you see a practice car on the road. Nice drivers do help me gain more confidence when using the roads.

To all the drivers out there, be nice to the learning and new drivers (not referring to myself only but also to the rest of the new road users). You were also once a rookie driver. It'll help us, the new drivers, a lot. To the nice and kind drivers that I've encounter, thank you so much and keep on looking out for the new drivers. It could be irritating at times, but your patience does helps and would not intimidate the new drivers as much as being on the road is already a scary experience especially for first-timers.

To a certain friend, Jonathan, who tried to change my mind about stick driving... nope, I still hate stick driving as much as I hate it in the first place. I'll stick to auto driving when I get my driver's license. :)

This short update turned out to be such a long-winded post. Sorry about that. I do get carried away at times while writing a post. :P

Drive safe :)

Hannah

Life Without Limits

During my January trip to one of my favourite country, Singapore, I bought Nick Vujicic's books - Life Without Limits and Unstoppable. I bought them because I've read the previews and they seem like a really good read. So when I stumbled upon the books in Kino, I bought them immediately.

I'm currently taking my time, reading Nick Vujicic's 1st book - Life Without Limits. By taking my time, it really does mean taking my time - slow and steady. I love reading and I can read pretty fast as well. I was trained into speed reading (since I was 7 years old) but still fully understanding the texts while reading them fast.

I'm reading this book at a slow pace because I can be very emotional and very, very overwhelmed when reading "Life Without Limits". I find myself bawling my eyes out after reading a page because EVERY SINGLE WORD in the book MAKES SO MUCH SENSE TO ME! It felt like that book was written just for me but of course, it's not.

This is the first time that I've cried so much while reading a book. I can only manage a couple of chapters at a time, to not overwhelm myself. After reading those few pages, the words tends to dwell in my head for hours and hours. I felt like my insecurities and doubts were spoken to.

This is for those of you who does not know whom Nick Vujicic is.

Nicholas James "Nick" Vujicic (born 4 December 1982) is a Serbian Australian evangelist and motivational speaker born with tetra-amelia syndrome, a rare disorder characterized by the absence of all four limbs. As a child, he struggled mentally and emotionally as well as physically, but eventually came to terms with his disability and, at the age of seventeen, started his own non-profit organization, Life Without Limits. Vujicic presents motivational speeches worldwide, on life with a disability, hope and finding meaning in life. He also speaks about his belief that God can use any willing heart to do his work and that God is big enough to overcome any and all disabilities.

- Excerpted from Wikipedia

Nick Vujicic, you really inspire me! Despite having physical disabilities, he lives life much  more better than I do. 

God really does work in mysterious ways to answer my doubts. I was really self-doubting myself about a particular incident, thinking that, "Nah, it's impossible for me to do it because I'm never clever enough or good enough."

Then while reading "Life Without Limits", on Page 61, there's this paragraph. It's like magic or something. Does the book knows what I'm thinking? It's a little creepy there. It goes :-

Hold that thought: Anything is possible. When you feel wiped out and blown away by a huge challenge, trust that anything is possible. You may not see a way out at the moment. You may feel that the whole world is lined up against you. But believe that circumstances can change, solutions can appear, and help can arrive from unexpected places. Then anything is possible!

Tears just came down after reading that paragraph. I mean, I was like just only thinking about it a couple hours ago, and this just came to me. WOW! Can you believe it? I was a little creep-ed out then. How did the timing work out that way? Like was I meant to read that at a particular time?

God never fails to amaze me. Whenever I'm praying, in need of some encouragement to go on, there will always be words of comfort and support given to me. Be it from family, friends or from unanticipated people or places. There's just always enough courage to continue my journey on.

This reminds me of one of my favourite song from Hillsong - God is Able. I've included the song below for your listening pleasure. :)

Blessed, I am.

Hannah. 

One month in one post

It's been a month since I've posted anything here, on my blog. A month can be rather long... or short, depending on how you look at it. No worries, I'm still alive and well, living everyday as best as I could.

I've been really busy during the past month. Busy with the Lunar New Year, busy processing my school stuff, busy with my other commitments. It sure has been a hectic month, full of life's ups and downs but nonetheless, I'm still thankful that I'm still living and kicking... just not sure if I'm as sane though after this 1 month. HAHA! :P

I went to KK to celebrate Lunar New Year with my paternal family whom I visit only maybe once or twice a year only. I always enjoy being back there because I miss my paternal family a lot. I mean, I get to eat really yummy foods made with love by my aunt (my dad's older sister. Oh yeah, my aunt is like ONE OF THE BEST COOK EVER!), go shopping (KK has like many more shopping centers than in Brunei definitely), just wandering around and try as many nice food available everywhere and just simply enjoy the bonding time with my grandma, aunts and cousins.

After the trip to KK, I've also been busy, busy, busy especially with the school things. My friends also helped me out a lot by ferrying me to and fro (because I can't drive yet. Thank you so much, Ping and Pistachio!). I'm thankful for such good friends.

It's not all that bad but the stress can really get to you. I find myself crying a lot (yeah, I cry when I'm stressed out. Crying is like an emotional outlet for me. I think I need to find a more POSITIVE outlet) and being really edgy and frustrated all the time.

I need to say that I'M REALLY SORRY to all the people whom I've not been really nice too at certain times where I just snap back and be really hostile because I was really stressed and mentally exhausted. THANK YOU so much for enduring my unfriendliness at times. It's just that when all the things get piled up, I tend to just break down.

I'm only human. I'm only skin and blood and bones. I'm not perfect.

I fell, I cried, I crumbled but everything will be just fine.

Keeping strong,

Hannah

Happy Lunar New Year

HAPPY LUNAR NEW YEAR everyone!!! It's the time of the year again. Many of us would be celebrating this festive season in our respective hometowns or wherever you might be, with our families and friends. This is an occasion where most of the family, from near and from afar, unite together as one. 

This year of 2013 would be the Year of the Snake. I would like to wish all of you a  HAPPY, HEALTHY, PROSPEROUS and SUCCESSFUL year ahead of you.

This is a time where you get to bond with people whom you've not seen for a long time, create new memories and to mediate the ties with one another. Also, there would be many red packets to receive, snacks and goodies to snack on, fireworks and lion dances to up the festive cheer. 

Remember to be good to one another, to drink plenty of water after the many yummy snacks and foods available while house visiting and be thankful. :)

May you all have a wonderful Lunar New Year,

Hannah

Last day of 2012

After me being missing in action for this past half-month, I'm back!! :D Well, I've been back in Brunei a week ago and things have been great. I missed posting on Christmas, so even though it's a little late (better late than never right?), I just want to wish everybody a MERRY CHRISTMAS!! :)

I came back the day before Christmas eve to spend my Christmas back here in Brunei with family and friends. I had a wonderful Christmas dinner at Uncle Alex's and Auntie Jo's residence on Christmas eve with a few other families. You know, just to catch up with one another and to have fellowship. I, as well as all the others I'm sure, are all very well fed that night with all the delicious food that Auntie Jo prepared. Turkey, salmon, lasagna, salad, sushi, cakes... a delicious spread. :) 

I had a nice Christmas day as well. Had a Christmas service and I saw many of my friends being back in Brunei from their studies, winter break or just a nice short holiday. My family and I even went for a movie outing that Christmas night. We went to watch "Ah Boys to Men". Another Jack Neo's masterpiece. I love how the movie is hilarious, heartwarming and educating at the same time. I briefly tweeted after the movie and tagged Irene Ang (an actress from the movie whom I like since the Phua Chu Kang days), and never would I have expected, Irene Ang tweeted me back!! What a nice lady she is. Anyway, it's a really good movie to watch. My family and I love it a lot! It's almost a week since we last saw the movie... and we're still talking about it. Can't wait for the Part 2 of "Ah Boys to Men" to be out next February of 2013.

I've been spending my days back in Brunei well. Had many family moments and even went out to catch up with a couple of close friends. Little did I realise that THE LAST DAY OF THE YEAR IS TODAY!! Can you believe it?!?! I'm not sure if I'm ignorant or rather, living my days a little too well, that I didn't catch on soon enough that today is NEW YEAR'S EVE!! It wasn't that long ago since the last new year's eve right?? 

WOW!! What a year!! For the past 365 days (well, there's 366 days this year since it's a leap year :P), I've been on what-others-might-call-it, a roller coaster ride. I'm pretty sure that I'm not the only one experiencing it this year. There have been many ups as well as the many downs that I've faced. Trials and challenges, happiness and blessings, I've seen a lot this year. But, I'm very grateful to have come to where I am now. There has been many times where I would feel like giving up, especially this year for me, I've been having exams for THE PAST 11 MONTHS!! Yeah, you read it. 11 months of school based exams and public exams. Thank goodness it's over and done with.

I'm never one who has always excelled in my studies but I do try my best in whatever that I was doing. It was hard but thankfully, through prayers and support from many of my friends and family, I finished what I had to. It was really a challenging path. Oh boy... I can still remember doing maths until the wee hours of the night, crying so much because the maths was so hard and I couldn't do them. Haha.. what an embarassing moment to share but it's now a memory. Hopefully, my results would be satisfying so that I wouldn't need to retake my exams. *prayingeverydayforsatisfyingresults*

Anyway, there's just a BIG part in me that's just SO RELIEVED that this year is finally over!! 2012 has been a challenging year, I have no idea what 2013 holds for me. I'm praying and hoping that 2013 would be a year full of blessings and thanksgiving for me and everyone else. 23 hours more to the new year. So, just enjoy the rest of the day, have fun, raise your glass and ring in the new year! HAPPY NEW YEAR 2013 EVERYONE!! :)

Big love,

Hannah